


The Forgotten Assassin

by Shadowranger



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Assassin merlin, Merlin knows how to fight, Merlin's past is catching up to him, Nightmares, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-06-04 22:38:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6678160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowranger/pseuds/Shadowranger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Merlin starts having nightmares about a past he thought he had left behind, things get a little confusing for Arthur, his knights, and even Morgana!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Set after 5x02 anything that happens after is subject to change. Assassin!Merlin, possibly a reveal!fic, we'll see where it goes from here.

_ The air was cold against his face, adrenalin rushing through his veins. Wolf lifted up his dagger to deal a mortal blow to the sleeping victim and _

“NO!”, Merlin shouted, bolting upright soaked in sweat.

 

“Calm down my boy, it was just a dream”, Gaius said running in to comfort him, “You escaped from them years ago, they won’t find you here.”

 

“I know, but that doesn't stop the nightmares from coming,” Merlin said as he tried to calm his heart rate down, “I should better get ready, it’s almost time to wake Arthur anyway.” he said, getting up.

 

“You are going to have to tell him about your past sometime Merlin.” Gaius said

 

“I know, I need to go now or he’ll yell at me for being late.” Merlin said, avoiding the subject and rushing out to avoid the ‘eyebrow of doom’, grabbing some bread for his breakfast.

* * *

 

After grabbing a good sized breakfast for the king, Merlin went up to Arthur’s chambers and went over to the curtains.

 

“Let’s have you lazy daisy!” He shouted with obvious delight.

 

“ _ Mer _ lin, do you have to do that  _ every _ morning?” Arthur questioned with spite in his voice, having been rudely awakened from his peaceful slumber.

 

“If I don’t, you would never wake up in the morning.” Merlin said, his bright blue eyes glimmering with mischief.

* * *

 

After finally getting the sleepy king out of bed and properly dressed, they both headed out to the training grounds where the rest of the knights of the round table were already going through drills.

 

“Alright, gather up knights,” Arthur called, “today, we’re going to work on something different.”

 

“Nice of you to join us princess.” Gwaine said walking over with the rest of the knights.

 

“Today,” Arthur said, ignoring Gwaine, “we will be working on throwing knives. Now, I trust you all have learned at least the basics?” Arthur said, looking at all the knights.

 

“I never learned how,” Admitted Percival, “I had never needed to learn.”

 

“Neither have I,” said Mordred, “As you know, I came from a very peaceful people, so I never really learned any sort of fighting. I picked up swordsmanship while traveling.”

 

“Well, that’s not a problem,” Arthur said, “while it’s not a part of basic training, it is a useful skill to have, so I didn’t expect all of you to know how. Even i’m not that good at throwing knives but my father saw fit to train me with as many skills as possible.”

 

“I could teach him how.” A voice said behind Arthur.

 

“ _ You _ know how to throw knives Merlin?”

Everyone shared Arthur’s shock at the quiet manservant speaking up.

 

“Sure, i’m not completely incompetent when it comes to weapons, just when they happen to be too large or too heavy.”

Everyone continued to stare in disbelief

 

“What, you want me to prove it? I really can throw knives, probably better than any of you even.”

Arthur suddenly burst out laughing.

 

“Really  _ Mer _ lin, you expect us to believe that  _ you  _ know how to throw knives? You can't even walk through the halls without tripping over your own feet.”

 

“Would you like me to prove my point sire?” Merlin said mockingly.

 

“Sure, if you can hit the target with all the knives, then you may train sir Mordred and sir Percival in knife throwing” He said gesturing at the target range.

Merlin walked over to where the targets and knives were already set up and picked up one of the four laid out for that target. He tossed it in the air, testing the balance and caught it by the blade.

 

“Careful, you wouldn’t want to hurt yourself.” Arthur called mockingly.

 

“I told you already, I know what i’m doing.” Merlin shot back.

He pulled his hand back and with a practiced move, threw the knife at the target.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, sorry I'm late posting this but let's get on with the story!

_ "If you can hit the target with all the knives, then you may train sir Mordred and sir Percival in knife throwing” Arthur said gesturing at the target range. _

_ Merlin walked over to where the targets and knives were already set up and picked up one of the four laid out for that target. He tossed it in the air, testing the balance and caught it by the blade. _

 

_ “Careful, you wouldn’t want to hurt yourself.” Arthur called mockingly. _

 

_ “I told you already, I know what i’m doing.” Merlin shot back. _

_ He pulled his hand back and with a practiced move, threw the knife at the target. _

* * *

 

Thud. The knife hit the target dead-center. Merlin quickly picked up all but one of the rest of the knives, and one-by-one threw them with deadly accuracy.

 

“You weren’t kidding mate, you’re better than  _ anyone _ i’ve seen!” Gwaine exclaimed in surprise.

Turning back to smile at the dumfounded faces Arthur called out, “You still have one knife left.”

Merlin smiled, and turned around fully so that his back was to the target, picking up the last knife as he went.

 

“I know.” He said, still smiling and threw the knife over his shoulder without looking back. The knife found it’s place in the central area where the rest of the knives had landed.

The knights and Arthur just gaped at him. 

 

“Well, I guess Percy and Mordred should come with me so I can show them how to hold a throwing knife without hurting themselves, and you can take the rest of the knights and work on their skills.” Merlin said, snapping them out of their awestruck trance. 

 

“ _ Where _ did you learn to throw like that Merlin!” Arthur yelped, “First you can juggle, now this?! What else do I not know about you?”

Merlin just chuckled softly, “There’s a lot you don’t know about me Arthur.”

 

“Apparently,” Arthur said still shocked by the skills his manservant possessed, “but you didn’t answer my question; where did you learn to throw like that?”

 

“Back in Ealdor. There wasn’t a lot to do so me and Will decided we would learn how to throw knives.” Merlin said, smiling at the memory.

“How old were you when you started?” Leon asked, clearly intrigued.

 

“I tried to throw my first knife when I was seven. Unfortunately, the first thing that happened when I picked up my knife was it slipped and I cut myself because I didn’t hold it properly. Which is  _ why _ I should really take Mordred and Percy and show them how to hold their knives.” Merlin said, reminding them all why Merlin gave them that little knife show.

 

“Of course. Merlin, go take Percival and Mordred and show them how to throw knives properly.” Arthur said, getting back on track.

 

“And after that, you can come and give us some pointers on how to throw like that.” Gwaine said, still a little star-struck.

* * *

 

After a long and trying session of throwing knives, with Merlin helping them all improve their aim and throw, Merlin and Mordred went to Gaius’s to stitch up a nasty cut Mordred had received at the end of training when Mordred’s knife had slipped. They reached the physician's chambers and went inside. 

“Gaius,” Merlin called out, “Sir Mordred needs some stitches. His knife slipped in practice today”

 

“Did you say knife Merlin? What were you doing with knives?”

 

“Throwing them. Or at least trying to” Mordred said with a sheepish grin on his face, holding out his hand wrapped in a hastily applied bandage.

 

“Merlin tried to warn me to always keep a firm grip on my knife, I guess it wasn’t firm enough.”

 

“Merlin was helping with knife throwing?” Gaius said, shock prominent on his face as he glanced at Merlin.

 

“Yes, he’s actually quite good at it, who would have guessed?” Mordred said as he sat down so Gaius could look at his hand.

 

“Well, to be fair I have been throwing knives for far longer than any of you; even Arthur.” Merlin said as he went to get the clean water pitcher to clean Mordred’s hand with.

 

“You weren’t even using magic to make them aim straight! I had to cheat a little just to make sure I didn’t hit anyone.” Mordred winced quietly when Gaius started stitching up the wound.

 

“Well, you will just have to practice throwing knives after you heal. You should try to not use this hand until it heals. After I finish with this I will give you a poultice that I want you to apply every 12 hours. Let me know if it hurts and I will give you something for the pain.” Gaius said, quickly and efficiently stitching up the cut on his hand.

 

“Thank you Gaius, I’ll be sure to do that.” Mordred said while Gaius applied the poultice for the first time. Then Gaius wrapped Mordred’s hand up and sent him off.

 

“Now then, knife throwing? Did you tell anyone why you are so good?” Gaius asked.

 

“I told them what I told you originally, that I taught myself in Ealdor.” Merlin said, putting away the extra bandages.

 

“Nobody questioned how you were able to get so good in a small village? I was suspicious of your talent immediately.” Gaius said, concerned

 

“Well, you are the only one who has lived in Ealdor for longer than three days and when Arthur was staying there, we were under attack by bandits or being chased down by Morgana and Agravaine. Besides, it’s not like I was lying, I really did teach myself with Will, I just conveniently forgot to mention that I spent five years being trained to kill a man with one without being spotted in a crowded marketplace.” Merlin paused, shivering at the memory.

 

“While we’re on the subject, do you have any idea as to why you’re having so many nightmares about your,  _ endeavors _ recently?” Gaius asked, pausing in the middle of the sentence to try and find the right word.

 

“I’m not sure, and that worries me.” Merlin said, remembering his nightmares, no his memories from the previous two weeks, “They’ve been going on for a fortnight now. Normally at most it would be once a week. The only time they were this bad was when I first found my way back to Ealdor when I was thirteen.”

 

“Well then, let’s just hope it’s old memories resurfacing. I will make a sleeping draught to help you sleep tonight. You should probably get back to helping Arthur. I won’t keep you any longer.”

* * *

 

The rest of the day passed as normally as it could in Camelot on a day with no magical attacks, which meant it was an insanely boring day for both king and manservant. The end of the day and Merlin was doing a last cursory cleaning of the king’s chambers while Arthur was getting into his sleepwear. When Merlin was just about to leave, Arthur called out, “Make sure to wake me up early, or even just on time for once. We’re leaving on a hunt tomorrow.”

 

“Really,” Merlin said nervously, “ For how long?”

 

“We’ll be gone for a fortnight Merlin, but don’t be such a girl’s petticoat, it’s not that long. Just make sure you pack the  _ comfortable _ sleeping rolls this time. The ones you brought last time were too lumpy.”

 

“Yes sire.” Merlin said with a sigh, wondering how he was going to get out of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the plot thickens! See you next chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, chapter three. Nothing really to say so... R&R? Hope you enjoy it!   
> P.S. The italics before the first break are just the last lines from the previous chapter, and the ones after are a dream Merlin's having.

_ When Merlin was just about to leave, Arthur called out, “Make sure to wake me up early, or even just on time for once. We’re leaving on a hunt tomorrow.” _

 

_ “Really,” Merlin said nervously, “ For how long?” _

 

_ “We’ll be gone for a fortnight Merlin, but don’t be such a girl’s petticoat, it’s not that long. Just make sure you pack the  comfortable sleeping rolls this time. The ones you brought last time were too lumpy.” _

 

_ “Yes sire.” Merlin said with a sigh, wondering how he was going to get out of this. _

* * *

 

_ Sweat rolled down his bare back as he sparred against Falcon. Both in the white cotton pants that they wore for training, their upper halves were exposed showing off various scars that they had gotten training as well as on the job, and the brands that marked them as assassins. _

 

_ “Come on Wolf, is that the best you can do?” Falcon taunted, “The first-timers are better than you.” _

 

_ “Well, maybe i’m just trying to keep you off guard” Wolf retorted and slammed Falcon into the ground with brutal force. Falcon got the wind knocked out of him and Wolf sat on him until Falcon hit the ground three times, indicating submission. Wolf then stood up and helped him off the ground. _

 

_ “Carefull there Wolf, Jackal will get mad if one of us gets injured enough to be unable to go on jobs.” The brunette said, wincing as he did so. _

 

_ “Indeed, it would be bad if my best workers had to take a break.” said a voice behind them. _

 

_ “Master Jackal!” They exclaimed at the same time, dipping into bows. _

 

_ “Apologies Master, we didn’t hear you approach.” said Falcon, not looking up. _

 

_ “Yes, we’ll have to work on that. In the meantime, I have a job for the both of you. You will meet with King Cenred in his palace to get the details of the job. Go and be ready to leave by sunrise tomorrow. You are dismissed” _

 

_ “Yes Master.” they said and walked out to ready their weapons and armor. _

 

_ “Oh and Wolf,” Jackal called out not turning around, “when you come back, I would like you to  _ speak _ with one of our new ‘recruits’. He’s being a little too stubborn for our tastes, and you know how to fix that.” _

 

_ “Yes Master.” Wolf said after a pause catching the hidden meaning in his words. He was completely confident that after he finished the boy would be eager to receive training, breaking people was his specialty after all. Wolf absentmindedly ran through the list of ways of ‘speaking to people’ he had been taught and endured throughout the years. This was going to be fun. _

 

Merlin bolted upright ( _ without screaming this time thankfully  _ he thought, not wanting to wake Gaius) covered in sweat with his legs tangled in the sheets. For a while all he could hear was his ragged breathing, his heartbeat racing and all he could think was how he could possibly get out of going on that long hunt. If it were three days like most hunts, Merlin could just not sleep for three days but a fortnight? Merlin could barely go one week without sleep, let alone two. Merlin sighed and got out of bed to get ready for the day, thinking about the good and bad things that happened from the time he was nine until the time he was fourteen.

* * *

 

Meanwhile, in the Assassin’s kingdoms, a dark deal was going down.

 

“I take it we have a deal then?” A silky voice questioned.

 

“Don’t worry, our assassins will not fail at taking down king Arthur. We already are luring him into a trap. We will not fail Lady Morgana.” A second voice replied.

 

“And when this is over, I will help you find your ‘Wolf’ using his magical signature. Don’t worry Jackal, I will fulfill my part of the bargain once you fulfill yours.” Jackal grinned. After six long  years, he would finally get his best assassin back.

* * *

 

“Are you sure that you want to go on this hunt sire?” Merlin questioned, ”I mean with all you kingly duties and such I hardly think you could afford to stay away from the kingdom for more than three days”

 

“Calm down  _ Mer _ lin, it’s not like we’re going to be gone for a month.”

 

“Yeah just two weeks” Merlin muttered under his breath.

 

“What was that Merlin?”

“Nothing sire. I’ll just go get the horses saddled then shall I?” Asked Merlin with a sigh, admitting defeat.

 

“Yes that would be good. Nice to see you actually doing your job  _ Mer _ lin.”

 

Merlin just grumbled and made a mental note to go back to his room and collect his throwing knives as he walked away. 

 

He did keep a few things from his life as an assassin, one of them being his perfectly balanced throwing knives that he had forged himself with some help from the weapons maker back in Jackal’s lands. They were things of deadly beauty made from pure silver, ten blades etched with designs of wolves hunting while the hilts were expertly wrapped in comfortable grips with his assassin’s signature, a letter W in unique script, burned into the leather.

While he did not have very many good memories of his time living in the assassin’s lands, he did have some things that he admitted he missed. His only friend Falcon, his custom designed leather armour, even certain training sessions . But there were many things he didn’t miss as well. Most of the training sessions, ‘talking’ to stubborn new recruits, taking assignments from Jackal. He did more horrible things during those five years than any boy his age should have done.

 

Shaking himself out of his darker thoughts, he walked over to the stables and asked one of the stable boys to saddle his and Arthur’s horses, then headed back to his small room to retrieve his knives as well as the complex scabbard designed to hold them all. He smiled as he put the knives in their places then put the scabbard in his bag. After all. if he was going to stay up all night for two weeks, he may as well have something to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my personal theory, every magic user has a type of magical 'signature' that they give off whenever they cast a spell or something. If the mage is powerful enough or has been in contact with items for a long period of time they give off the same signature.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, sorry for not posing chapters on here, to be honest I forgot that I hadn't posted all the chapters I have on here. I actually have 9 chapters finished so I'm going to be uploading them all right now to catch up this story with the one I posted on FF.net

_ Merlin walked over to the stables and asked one of the stable boys to saddle his and Arthur’s horses, then headed back to his small room to retrieve his knives as well as the complex scabbard designed to hold them all. He smiled as he put the knives in their places then put the scabbard in his bag. After all. if he was going to stay up all night for two weeks, he may as well have something to do. _

* * *

 

“So, is there anything else you’re not telling us about yourself Merlin?” Gwaine asked as he and the other knights of the round table set off for their hunting expedition, “Like for example why you don’t like hunting even though you have such a great skill with throwing knives?”

 

“No, not really. As for why I don’t like hunting, I just don’t think it’s fair to the animals that they don’t have anything to fight back with. Hunting is very unfair seeing as we give them no warning as to when we’re going to attack.”

 

“Oh stop whining  _ Mer _ lin, it’s not unfair they’re just dumb animals. Besides, it’s not like there aren’t any bunnies in other woods.” Arthur said, still not understanding why his manservant didn’t want to be away from Camelot for so long, it’s not like they haven't been on longer treks than this. Arthur resolved to speak with  his servant when they stopped to break camp. Not because, he was worried about the boy mind you, just because whenever Merlin got like this he was more clumsy and annoying than usual.

* * *

 Merlin was on high-alert. Normally he would only pay as much attention as needed to his surroundings, but today every little noise made him jump. He was grateful for the fact that he had been trained to not react, otherwise he would have been flinching all over the place. He figured that his recent ‘dreams’ were the cause of his unease. Merlin sighed.

 

“Something the matter?” Came a voice behind him, “You seem distracted.” Arthur, who was now identified as the source of the voice, rode up behind him.

 

“No, everything's fine, I just can’t help but think that we’ve forgotten something back in Camelot is all.”

 

“I told you  _ Mer _ lin, we didn’t leave anything back in Camelot. We have everything we need for this trip, and anything we did leave will be able to wait for two weeks.” Arthur said, exasperated that Merlin was still trying to get out of going on this trip, “The council can handle any political matters while we are on this hunt. Why do you want to get out of this so badly anyway?”   
  


“I just have a bad feeling about this.” Merlin said. He wasn’t exactly lying though, he really did have a bad feeling about leaving Camelot when he had been having these dreams recently. He hadn’t told Gaius but he had a feeling that these dreams were a sign that something was going to happen soon. Something that had to do with his past as an assassin.

* * *

 

“Falcon,” Jackal called out.

 

“Yes, Master Jackal?” The assassin questioned, taking a break from his training.

 

“I have a new job for you. The King of Camelot is going on a long hunt with his most trusted knights. I’d like you to  _ visit _ with them.” Jackal said calmly.

 

“You actually gave in to the Lady Morgana’s requests? Why?” Falcon questioned, “What did she have to offer that was better than all of the gold and treasures she promised already?”

 

“She agreed to help us find an old friend. It turns out that the Lady Morgana can track  _ magical  _ signatures.”

 

Falcon gasped softly. “I’ll be ready to leave at first light. Where will I find King Arthur?”

 

“In the Darkling Woods, so be on guard and watch for serkets. Also be aware that the king has some of his best knights with him, so make sure to be ready to take care of them as well. You are dismissed.”

 

Falcon bowed and left, thinking of ways to quickly take out the king of Camelot and some of his most trusted knights. While he tried not to let his emotions get involved in his work, he was already exited at the notion that killing this one person would make it so he could see his best friend again. Rest assured, if he had anything to say about it, Arthur Pendragon’s days were numbered.

* * *

 

Merlin couldn’t believe his luck. He had been tired all day, still not used to be riding a horse for that long, a pounding headache, an empty stomach, and the first place they stop to make camp is the Lake of Avalon. The one place that had held so many bittersweet memories ever since Freya. The lake where he had originally placed the sword which he forged in the dragon’s breath. The place where he had laid his most trusted friend and the love of his life. The last place he wanted to be when he was having so many dreams about the most shameful part of his past.

 

“You alright mate, looks like you’ve seen a ghost!” Gwaine said, riding up beside him.

 

“Fine!” Merlin said a bit too quickly, “I should probably start setting up camp now Gwaine.” Merlin said, avoiding the questions that Gwaine so clearly wanted to ask.

 

The rest of the night was filled with Merlin dodging questions, running off to get firewood multiple times and even just plain hiding. Gwaine had been trying to corner him ever since they first got to the clearing, and it was clear that Arthur had been trying to get him alone so they could speak about something. Merlin wasn’t stupid, he could tell that Arthur had noticed his over-alertness riding today and was just waiting for the right moment to speak with the boy. Merlin was sure that there was never a moment like that, and having miraculously dodged all questions thrown at him by Arthur and Gwaine, it was time to go to bed. Elyan, like always, took first watch. When he was sure that all the other knights had gone to bed, Merlin strapped the scabbard with his throwing knives over one shoulder and stealthily crept through the forest until he could throw his knives without alerting anyone. He chose a tree that looked sturdy, carved a target out with one of his knives, replacing it after, and took a few steps back. Then, with practiced ease, he pulled a knife out of his scabbard and threw it at the target, the rhythmic motion giving him the peace sleep would not.


	5. Chapter 5

_ Merlin strapped the scabbard with his throwing knives over one shoulder and stealthily crept through the forest until he could throw his knives without alerting anyone. He chose a tree that looked sturdy, carved a target out with one of his knives, replacing it after, and took a few steps back. Then, with practiced ease, he pulled a knife out of his scabbard and threw it at the target, the rhythmic motion giving him the peace sleep would not. _

* * *

 

Falcon set out for the Darkling Woods the next day. After a long night of preparations with only a few hours of sleep due to anticipation, he was ready to leave at dawn. According to the Lady Morgana and her sources in Camelot’s castle, the King and his knights had set out the day before and would not be expected back for a fortnight, their hunting path taking them close to the borders of Camelot. By his estimation, Falcon would intercept the hunting party in about two days depending on how fast or slow the King and his company were going. 

 

Falcon hadn’t had anything against Camelot, he actually thought it was a fairly good place. But now, he just couldn’t help but resent the king and his knights; they were the only thing standing in the way of his best and only friend. Sure Master Jackal seemed fond of him, but that was just because he was currently the best assassin they had. He missed his best friend, not the assassin Wolf, but the kind boy who had befriended him. He didn’t know much about Merlin, just his name and what he was like. He would be about twenty by now, Falcon thought, trying to picture what he would look like. While he was Wolf, Merlin kept his hair longer so the ends were just below his shoulders. He would tie it back when he was on a job, but had insisted on keeping his hair unusually long. 

Merlin was the only one to know his real name, just like he was the only one to know Merlin’s. When first brought to the assassin’s land, kids are told to not tell anyone their name, because once they are trained, they earn a new name based on the attributes they show after their first mission in the field. The assassins give you a new identity, they remake you until you forget who you ever were. Sometimes, late at night, he would whisper his real name, so he would not forget who he was. Who he really was. “Rian,” he muttered, finding himself overwhelmed with memories of before he went with the assassins, “My name is not Falcon. It is Rian.”

* * *

 

The next morning, Merlin snuck back into camp to see Mordred on the last watch.

 

_ “Where have you been Emrys? I didn’t see you when Sir Leon woke me for last watch.”  _ Mordred’s voice said in his mind.

 

_ “Just practicing a new magic trick Gaius taught me before we left. Sorry if I scared you.”  _ Merlin replied, going back to where his sleeping roll was set up and starting to pack it up. He was glad he had decided to hide the scabbard, lest the knight on watch ask why a simple peasant has such good knives, even if it was Merlin. He still didn’t trust Mordred, but his magic wasn’t warning him of any danger right now, so he decided to just keep up his guard around him. If his magic didn’t warn him of a threat, his instincts sure would, being a former assassin did have it’s perks. 

 

Making breakfast for the knights wasn’t easy considering that instead of sleeping he was training all night. He was being overwhelmed by memories both because of his dreams and because of the lake and to top if off he had to avoid being cornered by Arthur and Gwaine. Miraculously though, he was able to feed all the knights, grabbing a little for himself, pack up camp, and get all the horses watered and fed so they could get out of the clearing as quickly as possible.

 

“Goodness Merlin, if I didn’t know any better I’d say that you were an efficient servant we had brought along so we could have good service instead of… whatever it is you do.” Leon said jokingly, “Do you really want the trip to end so soon?”

 

“No, I was just hoping that the more tired you are the more noise we’ll make so we can alert the animals and give them a head start.” Merlin replied, his tone completely serious.

 

In reality, he was hoping that he could tire himself out enough to make his sleep so deep that he wouldn’t dream at all. He had managed it many times before when he was an assassin, so he knew how tired he had to feel before he could sleep. Unfortunately, he hadn’t needed to get to that level of exhaustion in years, so while he knew how it felt, he wasn’t sure if he could stay awake long enough to work himself to that point. He was already feeling at though he would collapse, if not from lack of sleep from when his nightmares started, than from the soreness of his arms for throwing all night long. It had been a while since he had practiced for that long and while it felt good at the time part of him was already regretting it, specifically his arms. He would have liked to  go into such a light sleep that he wouldn’t dream, another skill he learned from the assassins, but he had to be at least mostly rested in order to sleep like that; and having had only about an hour of sleep each night when he first started having nightmares, about two weeks ago, that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. He also couldn’t shake the feeling he was being watched, but he chalked that up to the fact that his senses had been on overdrive since they left yesterday. 

* * *

 

Leon could tell that there was something bothering the young manservant. He had hardly spoken all day, his movements seemed sluggish, almost painful when he moved his arms, and he was only going near Arthur and Gwaine when he had to, avoiding them like the plague any time else. Now that they were riding Leon could see that the boy was only moving his arms when he had to, and was rolling his shoulders like his back was bothering him. From their frowns, he could see that Arthur, Gwaine, and oddly Mordred had noticed as well. The three of them kept glancing at Merlin when they could afford to not pay attention to their horses. Merlin however seemed oblivious to being watched like that, although somehow at the same time he seemed jumpy, almost paranoid. 

 

Although he didn’t like to admit it, he had grown rather fond of the boy in the time that he was in Camelot. He still remembered the day that odd boy came into town; he had stood up to Arthur when he was being a bully, and upon learning of his status he didn’t back down, merely adjusted his insults to fit his rank. Merlin had more bravery than most knights he knew, and that was saying something. Not many knights would drink poison for someone whom they had just met, especially if they didn’t get along that well. At first Leon thought that his bravery was just pure stupidity but after spending so much time around him, he found that Merlin was not an idiot (no matter how much Arthur insisted he was), he was actually very smart, at times even wiser than a boy his age had any right to be. He had often wondered what it was that Merlin wasn’t telling them about his life that made him so wise, but he wasn’t about to ask. Merlin would tell them when he felt that the time was right, that he knew for certain. He could see the secrets eating at the boy from the inside out, and even though he didn’t know what the secret was, he could still tell it was something big. Leon just shook his head and decided to speak with the boy after this trip was over, not to interrogate him like it looked like Arthur and Gwaine wanted to do, but to reassure him that the knights were his friends and they would listen to anything he had to say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, 4 more chapters to upload in order to catch up. Please review if you like my story, it really helps me write faster.


	6. Chapter 6

They had been riding all day, seeing as they had a destination in mind for hunting. The Grove of Alvae was said to attract many animals this time of year and they were hoping to make it there by nightfall. Unfortunately for Merlin, this meant riding quickly with almost no rests making his arms and back cry out in protest while his overactive senses did nothing to help his pounding headache. He was constantly rolling his shoulders, which ached, in an attempt of alleviating his back, but to no avail. He was sure that others in the party had noticed by now, but he was too tired to care. He figured to himself that he could just rest when they stopped in the grove to make camp. Unfortunately for all of them they had to delay getting to the grove until tomorrow morning, because they came across a broken bridge at the harshest part of the river.

 

“Oh great, now we have to go the long way.” Arthur complained, “That’s going to add at least half a day onto our journey.”

 

Merlin cursed silently. Adding another half day of riding would not be good for his condition. He supposed that tonight he could try and get at least an hour of sleep. Being with the assassins gave him an astoundingly accurate internal clock, and because of that he had a way to set mental ‘alarms’ for himself meaning that he could go out away from the camp, get about an hour of sleep without alerting Arthur and the knights of his dreams, and still be able to work himself into a deep exhaustion. It didn’t sound good when he made the list in his head, but it was his only option if he wanted to keep his charade up. He was already formulating a plan when Gwaine happened to ride up next to him.

 

“So, what did I do?” The long-haired knight questioned.

 

“What do you mean Gwaine?” Merlin questioned, knowing where this conversation was headed.

 

“Don’t play dumb, why have you been avoiding me mate? Why have you been avoiding everyone for that matter?” Gwaine asked, clearly not going to leave once his opportunity was in sight seeing as he had cornered Merlin with no chance of the manservant escaping.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Merlin said stubbornly, “The only thing I’ve been avoiding is polishing Arthur’s muddy boots. Don’t you have something better to do than interrogate the hired help? Like continue to sneak sips of mead from the wineskin you smuggled on this trip?”

 

“How did you- wait, you’re doing it again.” Gwaine said

 

“Doing what?”

 

“Avoiding me.”

 

“No I’m not”

 

“Yes you are, you’re avoiding me and my questions. Probably why you’re avoiding Arthur too, right?”

 

“I’m not avoiding you, I just don’t want to talk.”

 

“HA! So you admit you’re avoiding me.” Gwaine said, smirking in triumph, “So why don’t you want to talk to us?”, concern spilling into the knight’s words.

 

“I just don’t okay? Please respect that I have my reasoning and don’t pry.”

 

“Gosh mate, you don’t have to get all snappy.” Gwaine said in surprise. He was really starting to worry about Merlin and decided that if his friend wasn’t going to talk with him, he would just figure out what was wrong by watching him like a hawk and keeping his distance.

* * *

 

Falcon had been making great time that day and calculated that he would get to the grove before the Camelot party made it there if they were keeping a good pace for a hunting party. He resolved to take a break, knowing if he didn’t need it his horse certainly did.

 

“Well, well, well, lookie what we have here. A man traveling on his own near the assassins lands. Now why would someone be stupid enough to do that? Without a sword as well I see.”

 

Falcon froze. He should have figured he would get ambushed sooner or later, seeing as what was referred to as the ‘Assassins Lands’ was a town filled to the brim with crooks and low-life hoods. It would be called something different, but seeing as the assassins instilled just the right amount of fear and respect in people they got to pick the name. There were many families and family lines in the assassin’s lands and there was at least one criminal in each generation. The orphanage was run by the Elders, a group of retired assassins that would train the new recruits whenever a child got abandoned, orphaned, sold to the assassins, or found their way to the orphanage one way or another. While most of the assassins were orphans, there were a few that weren’t. Like Jackal’s son Hawk. Realizing he was getting off track he shook himself out of his thoughts and started analyzing the poor souls who thought they could attack him. There were eight in all, probably just seeking refuge in the town while planning their next heist. It looked like they hadn’t stepped foot in the town before otherwise they would have recognized his leather armour as belonging to an assassin. It was always fun to let the newbies know who was in charge and he hadn’t intimidated anyone in a while. This was gonna be fun.

 

“Well now, not the chatty type are ya boy?” The leader of the pack said, clearly tired of waiting for a response.

 

“No,” Falcon finally replied, “I prefer to let my fists do the talking.”

 

He flew at them with unrestrained fury kicking and punching the first four surrounding him while reaching into his belt to pull out two of his shurikens and killing one of the men with one throw, his throwing stars landing in the thug’s throat and chest. He then pulled out a dagger and stabbed one through the heart, then stabbing another through the leg. He smashed an elbow into the nose of the man trying to sneak up on him while throwing his knife to impale the leg of another man. He took out another man by pinching a nerve in his neck causing the bandit to crumple in pain. He knocked another one out using the hilt of a second dagger he pulled out of his belt. He left the leader standing while the five others who were still alive were screaming in agony or unconscious.

 

“How did you- where did you- what!?” The bandit exclaimed in surprise and horror.

 

“The name’s Falcon. I suggest that when you get to town you don’t anger any more assassins if you want to keep the few men you have left. A word of advice; remember my style of armor, because this is the official uniform of the assassins and we run the place. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to leave places to be, people to kill, all that fun stuff. Oh, and don’t worry,” Falcon said walking over and addressing the man with the dagger in his leg, “The poison on my daggers is solely to cause pain. You and your remaining men should be fine assuming they don’t bleed out.”

 

He then walked over and pulled his throwing stars out of one of the bodies and mounted his horse, riding off without a word and leaving the unharmed bandit leader still shocked that all his men were taken out so easily by a small boy who couldn’t be over twenty years of age.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter, 3 more to go. Please R&R.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a very short chapter, made with the intention of having a cliffhanger. Of course, on here the next chapter will be posted in about a minute, but it's still fun to have cliffies.

The next night they made camp was beside the river. They decided to keep close to the river so they could cross the closest shallow area. Just before they decided to call it a night they all agreed that they needed to take a dip in the river. It was still too deep to cross, but there was a small alcove of sorts that formed a small pool-like area. While the knights stripped their clothes and jumped into the pool, Merlin just stood off to the side, sighing before moving to pick up the clothing from the ground so he could drape them over tree branches and bushes.

“Oi! Come in with us Merlin!”, Came Gwaine’s shout, “The water feels great!”

 “I’d rather bathe in private, thank you very much.” Merlin called back, clearly annoyed.

“What’s got him in such a stiff?” Asked Percival to Mordred quietly, “He normally only uses that tone when he’s mocking Arthur.”

“I’m not sure, but he’s been off for a few days now.” Responded Moedred, who had a thoughtful look on his face. 

They were both pulled out of their thoughts by Gwaine, who had decided to pull Merlin into the small pool when he tried to pick up an article of clothing that was close to the edge. The pool was large and deep enough that Merlin went completely under when he lost his balance from Gwaine’s pull and fell in. Seconds later, he burst out from under the surface gasping for air with a small degree of panic in his eyes. Without a word, he climbed out of the pool and headed straight for the camp. Nobody said anything. They were all too busy looking at where Merlin had left from while they were playing the scene through their heads over and over.

“What just happened?” Asked Arthur, breaking the silence at last.

“I-I was just trying to cheer him up. I guess I didn’t think it through.” Gwaine said ashamedly, “He just hasn’t been acting like normal is all. I guess i’ll go and see if he’s okay.” He said, moving to get out of the pool and grab his clothing. The rest of the knights were still confused, but didn’t make any move to stop him.

* * *

 

Back at the camp, Merlin was drying off near the newly built fire. Turns out the article of clothing near the pool was Gwaine’s shirt. Great. Speaking of shirts, his was soaking wet. Peeling off the offending article along with his trademark neckerchief, he hung them to dry near the fire as well. Turning to add more wood to stoke up the fire, he heard Gwaine waking up behind him

“Oi Merlin, I just wanted to say-” Gwaine cut himself off when he saw Merlin’s back.


	8. Chapter 8

_ Back at the camp, Merlin was drying off near the newly built fire. Turns out the article of clothing near the pool was Gwaine’s shirt. Great. Speaking of shirts, his was soaking wet. Peeling off the offending article along with his trademark neckerchief, he hung them to dry near the fire as well. Turning to add more wood to stoke up the fire, he heard Gwaine waking up behind him _

_ “Oi Merlin, I just wanted to say-” Gwaine cut himself off when he saw Merlin’s back. _

* * *

 

Merlin stiffened when he heard Gwaine come up behind him. Since his shirt wasn’t on his upper half was exposed, as well as the scars that covered him from before and after he came to Camelot. All in all he knew for a fact that his back was a mess, with the various whippings he had endured throughout the years along with the serkhet sting he had acquired a few years ago in the middle of his lower back.

 

“What happened to you!?” Came Gwaine’s strained and horrified cry.

 

Merlin sighed and reached for his still damp shirt and put it on as to not expose any more scars than the ones his friend had seen.

 

“I’m not going to get out of this one, am I?” Merlin asked, already knowing the answer.

 

“You’re bloody right you’re not. Now spill.”

 

Merlin just turned around his shirt fully on, concealing the scars.

 

“Most of them are from before I came to Camelot. I wasn’t the most... liked person in Ealdor. Some of the people who disliked me took it a little far sometimes.” Merlin said. He may not be the best liar, but technically those weren’t lies; he wasn’t the most liked person in Ealdor, tending to want to stay by himself. He also didn’t have a father, something that was very frowned upon especially in a small town like the one he grew up in. Some of the scars he had  _ were _ from when people in Ealdor took it a little too far. He winced a little at the memories.

 

“And the Serket’s sting? Don’t try to lie to me, I know what they look like. I’ve had friends who were stung before. None of them made it.” Gwaine said sadly. Merlin winced. He knew he would have to be careful with this part.

 

“That’s a little more complicated. See, when Morgause tried to take over Camelot the first time she had Morgana help her. I couldn’t tell anyone because nobody would have believed me, so I kept it to myself. I then followed Morgana one night and Morgause caught me. She then chained me up and left me to die. I don’t remember much that happened after the Serkets surrounded me, but I woke up in a Druid camp a little while later. I was still weak, but I had enough strength to make the trek back to Camelot. Arthur doesn’t know that part of the story so please don’t tell him.” Merlin added that last part quickly, knowing that Gwaine would probably go to Arthur with this story.

 

He could see the calculating look on Gwaine’s face and was sure he was going through scenarios in his head about what would happen if he told Arthur. Then after a moment, Gwaine moved to stand beside Merlin and lifted the hair from the nape of his neck. Without the hair there, you could see what looked like… a brand?

 

“I-I don’t understand. What happened to you?” Merlin asked, a little afraid of the answer he would get.

 

“Back when I was still wandering around I was caught by slave traders. Now normally slaves would be branded on their chests or something, but these traders were special.” Merlin stiffened at the tone of his voice. He could tell where this conversation was headed.

 

“You don’t have to tell me Gwaine; really it’s fine.” He said uncomfortably.

 

“No,” Gwaine said, grimacing a little, “I shouldn’t have forced you to tell me; besides, it might be good to get this off my chest. I’ve never told anyone about what happened to me. If I can’t tell my best friend, who can I tell?” He took a bit of a breath before speaking, “These slavers were prostitutes. They’d catch pretty looking people and sell them out to men and women for a ‘fun night.’ Those nights weren’t very fun for me though. Because of my constant exercise and travel, I was one of the better looking ones, so I was constantly in demand to ‘customers.’ Most of those customers were nobles too. Just made me hate them all the more. I was with them for about six months before someone betrayed the ring from the inside and let all the slaves loose. I’ve never been more grateful to someone in my whole life for getting me out of that hell. I still visit her sometimes, if my traveling routes take me close to her village.” Gwaine seemed a little tired after he finished the story, and that’s when he realized that the fire was dying down a little and he could hear Arthur and the rest of the knights coming back. They had been talking for at least a half an hour now. He handed Gwaine his now dry shirt, tied on his neckerchief, and walked away without another word.

* * *

 

Falcon arrived in the Grove just before nightfall. He had been pacing himself and made better time than he thought he would. The first thing he did when he got there was scout out the most probable places for the king and his knight’s campsite, then he made his own in a place where nobody would think to even go. That was how these kinds of missions always went; a one man ambush was more effective than you might think. Falcon always put his bed up in a tree. It originally started as a joke; on the first mission they went on together Wolf had put his sleeping mat in a tree and Falcon had camped in trees ever since, to keep the joke going of course, not like he  _ liked _ sleeping in the trees or anything. He started thinking about his friend again. When Wolf had told him his real name, he had started separating the two.

Wolf was the cold-hearted assassin who stopped at nothing to get the job done, while Merlin was the goofy clumsy boy who was kind to anyone and anything that crossed his path. The differences he found between the two were so dynamic, if he had known only one side of his friend he would have never guessed that the other half of his personality existed. His friend sure was a puzzle. He remembered when he had first figured out Merlin had magic.

 

_ It had started out on a regular training day. Since Falcon was still a new recruit, he had a hard time trusting anyone he saw, yet he felt a strange bond with the strange raven haired boy that slept next to him in the barracks. When he had first been assigned that spot, he had just been ‘broken in’ as Jackal seemed to love calling it, and the boy next to him gave him the first kind smile he had seen since he got to this place. After having spent a few weeks next to this odd little boy, Wolf he remembered, they seemed to bond. Now while Falcon had been raised in the Assassin’s Lands, he hadn’t had very much exposure or training for being a criminal of any kind. When his parents had died, he was sent to the orphanage to be trained. He had refused to answer to any name other than the one his mother had given to him. That was a big mistake. Now that he had learned how things worked in the orphanage, he quickly mastered his training, moving up in skill until he was sparring with Wolf. Wolf was always a match for him, they both seemed to have natural talent for the skills they were learning.  The masters quickly learned that the boys were a match made in heaven, when paired together in training exercises they always set new records, doing things in ways that would seem unconventional but worked. Wolf, as clumsy as he was, always seemed to have extremely good luck. It was that day he would learn it wasn’t luck. They were playing a game like hide and seek, with Falcon and Wolf as the seekers. The other trainees in their age group would go hide in the woods and the two seekers would have to find and immobilize everyone else, while avoiding the traps that the Masters had set up in the woods. They had to find one more person when Wolf tripped on some sort of wire that made the ground crumble from beneath them. _

 

_ “How did the Masters manage this!?” _


	9. Chapter 9

_ They were playing a game like hide and seek, with Falcon and Wolf as the seekers. The other trainees in their age group would go hide in the woods and the two seekers would have to find and immobilize everyone else, while avoiding the traps that the Masters had set up in the woods. They had to find one more person when Wolf tripped on some sort of wire that made the ground crumble from beneath them. _

 

_ “How did the Masters manage this!?” _

* * *

 

_They ended up in what looked like a long tunnel, the only light coming from the hole they fell through. It was about ten feet down, and with no grips on the walls and both of them were too short to stand on top of each other to reach where they fell through. After trying this last stunt and having Wolf fall off his shoulders, Falcon suggested they try going in one direction to see how far the tunnel went._

 

_“Why would we do that?” Wolf questioned._

 

_“Well, what else would we do? We’re obviously not making any progress staying here. Besides, what if we find a way out?” Falcon rebutted._

 

_“Well I don’t think it’s a good idea. Who knows what kinds of creatures are down here?” The other boy pressed on, “We could run into wildern, or worse; I’ve heard the caves of Balor have gigantic spiders that can take a grown man out with one bite! It’s better to stay here until someone comes looking for us.”_

 

_“That could take days! Didn’t you say the last game of hide and seek here took a month to find everyone? It’s already been three weeks. It could be even longer before they send anyone out looking, not to mention they have no idea where we ended up. I’m going to try and find a way out, so are you coming or not?” Falcon could see the other boy debating whether to follow him or not, but eventually Wolf gave a sharp nod._

 

_“I suppose it_ is _the best option, considering the circumstances. But keep close to me. I’ve been here longer, so I have more experience fighting. The masters would skin me alive if I let you die down here.” Wolf had a sharp, calculating look in his eyes. Falcon recognized what that meant. It meant he was planning and running through situations in his head. “There’s a draft coming from this direction, that means there’s an opening somewhere over there. That’s our best bet; but we’ll have to be careful. I don’t think we’re alone down here.” He said ominously._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that this story is officially caught up! I am currently working on chapter 10 but I honestly have no idea when it will be finished due to distractions (like plot bunnies) and family business. Thank you for reading and be sure to leave a review, they keep me motivated! Hope you all have a wonderful day/night.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, that's chapter one, please review and tell me what you thought! See you next week with another chapter!


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